Meet The VAR Guy In Vegas
The VAR Guy will be in Las Vegas next week, first to stop by Kaseya’s customer event and then to attend Cisco’s annual Partner Summit. Although he typically works in the shadows, here are five ways to spot The VAR Guy in Vegas.
- First, visit the New York, New York Hotel and Casino. As a general rule, The VAR Guy rides that hotel’s massive roller coaster the moment he arrives in Vegas. He also takes one last ride on the coaster before heading home from an event. If the line is short, The VAR Guy typically sits in the coaster’s first car. Best time to ride: 10:45 each week night, shortly before the coaster closes for the evening.
- Second, swing by the Circus, Circus Casino and Hotel. There, you’ll find an indoor, five-acre theme park. Again, look for The VAR Guy on coasters. (Are you beginning to see a pattern here?)
- Third, visit the Stratosphere Casino and Hotel, which boasts three of the highest thrill rides in the world. The lines are typically long, which means you can negotiate a lot of business with clients before climbing aboard one of the rides. Use acronyms like TCO, ROI and HYBOTRB (“Have You Been On This Ride Before?”) in order to keep the conversation moving and close some business quickly.
- Fourth, rent a car and drive 40 miles from Vegas to the Desperado roller coaster, one of the world’s largest coasters. See if you can schedule a business meeting in the Desperado parking lot in order to write off your gas and car rental costs.
- Fifth, show your inner geek and visit Star Trek The Experience at the Las Vegas Hilton. Just remember not to reference “George Lucas” or “Star Wars” when in the company of Trekkies. The VAR Guy is more of a Star Wars kind of guy. But to Trekkies, Star Wars is complete fiction that made a bad director rich; and Star Trek is a not-to-distant future where we’ll all be reunited with the late, great Gene Roddenberry.
If your office tries to reach you during these mandatory activities, tell them you’re walking the Las Vegas Strip and testing VoIP on the city’s new WiFi network. “Can You Hear Me Now?”
As you can see, it’s going to be a very busy week for The VAR Guy in Vegas. Somewhere in his schedule, he has to squeeze in a few legitimate meetings–before heading home for a weekend in Hershey Park (no joke). Will the demands on his time ever end?